How do you Know if Your Girlfriend Is Cheating with You
- 1Take a step back. Before you do anything rash, take a moment to exhale and consider the situation. Ask yourself:
- What makes you think she's cheating? Do you have hard evidence, or just a hunch?
- How trustworthy do you think your girlfriend is? Do you think she'd be capable of something like this?
- Has your girlfriend lied to you? Can you think of any instances when you haven't been sure she's telling the truth?
- Is she absent or unreachable for long periods of time? Does she bail out on your plans often?
- What makes you think she's cheating? Do you have hard evidence, or just a hunch?
- 2Observe. Watch how your girlfriend acts around you and other people. Do you notice any significant changes in her behavior, such as:
- Does she send you text messages or calls less often? If you start
being the one to call or text her first all the time, that's a bad sign.
- Secret phone conversations. Does she leave the room every time she
gets a call on her cell? Is she just trying to be polite? If she's
trying to guard her conversations on the phone, there may be reason to
worry.
- Distinct changes in appearance. If your girlfriend suddenly starts
worrying a little more about her appearance, (new clothes, always clean
shaven, spending more time in the mirror) she may be trying to look good
for someone else. If she gets dressed up for you, that's one thing but
if they seem to spend a little more time looking good to go out without
you, you might want to look into that.
- Picking fights: Is your girlfriend picking fights and arguing more
with you? This could just be an excuse to get out of the house. Picking a
fight and then storming out of the house to get away from you is an
easy way to go spend time with someone else.
- Lying: Catching her in a lie, no matter how small, is always cause
for concern. Try to connect lies with certain time frames and you may
have a connection to infidelity.
- Computer time: An increase in computer time may a sign you are being
cheated on. There are many adult chat rooms out there that cater to
infidelity.
- Friends behavioral change: If your friends seem to feel
uncomfortable around you, they may know something that you don't. This
is a classic sign that your girlfriend is cheating on you and you are
the last to know.
- Accusing you: Another common sign you are being cheated on is that
she constantly accuses you of the very same thing she is guilty of —
cheating. She may drop hints that you are having an affair because her
own guilt is starting to wear on her.
- Does she send you text messages or calls less often? If you start
being the one to call or text her first all the time, that's a bad sign.
- 3Express affection and watch how she responds. These are signs that she might be thinking of cheating:
- Tell her you love her. Does she say it back?
- Hold her hand. Does she try to pull it away? Does she look nervous?
- Tell her you love her. Does she say it back?
- 4Look at her past. Like the old saying goes, "Once a cheater, always a cheater". Has she snuck around other boyfriends in the past? If so, then, she might already be comfortable with cheating.
- 5Be up-front with her. Tell her you have something on your mind, and ask if she has time to talk in a private space. Don't accuse her (such as, "I know you're cheating!"), but do express your feelings (like "I feel like you're losing interest in our relationship").
- Notice whether or not she gives you an answer. If she isn't
cheating, she has no reason not to be straightforward and reassure you
that everything is fine. If she is, she might talk in circles without
really saying anything.
- If she becomes defensive or tries to turn the tables on you, this might be her guilt talking.
- Notice whether or not she gives you an answer. If she isn't
cheating, she has no reason not to be straightforward and reassure you
that everything is fine. If she is, she might talk in circles without
really saying anything.
- 6Follow your gut. Sometimes, you just know things without having to second-guess yourself. No amount of crying and denial can rival the feelings you have in the pit of your stomach. After you've taken all the evidence into consideration, it's time to follow your gut. If she's thinking of cheating or has a wandering eye, chances are she thinks she can do better. If so, then maybe you can too.
- 7Remember it's not your fault. There are a myriad of reasons to break up with someone but only one reason to cheat. It is a personal failing on the cheater, not the cheated. Because if you didn't complete them, then they should break up with you; not cheat on you. So even if you are the worst person in the world, the only reason to cheat is because they have a problem, not you.
Tips:
- Don't just randomly ask her, "Hey, you wouldn't happen to be cheating on me, would you?" She's going to say no anyway and she'll think you don't trust her.
- Girls are allowed to have guy friends. And they are generally more physical with friends, regardless of gender, so don't assume she's cheating if you see her hug another guy. Might want to just watch a little closer.
- Do not cheat out of spite or in retaliation, because people will assume that you are the bad person as you are not doing it out of pure ignorance.
- Accusing a girl of cheating may get you dumped.
- Nothing you can do will dictate her actions. Sometimes, there is simply nothing you can do but walk away. Never, ever, dismiss this as an option or you will not get anywhere.
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